Last Tuesday at Bilbo's I got a call from Jenna. Her and her friend 'Wendy' was hungry and wanted to pick up a cheese pizza. Brittany is a confirmed vegan, witch pissed me off. Vegans just bother me, because they think they are better than meat eaters. They hold their head up high because they don't eat bacon. But why would she, she has enough on her back. I think secretly these people eat jerky in their basement.
Ironically these vegans are going to end up eaten alive by a bear during an animal rights rally. The only rights animals have is the right to be rare, medium, or well done.
Let me rephrase that. If you are a vegan, and don't eat eggs, milk, cheese, or use leather or any other products animals helped cultivate, then I stand by your decision, mainly because you didn't half ass it. The other reason is that you wont be able to survive without the help of animals, and your life expectancy- well, just don't expect life. You will die off soon, thus making less R-tards contaminating our gene pool.
Back to the story... so she is a vegan, and while I'm making this pizza, I'm damn-near pissing myself because I'm stuffing pepperoni in the pizza discretely enough not to get caught.
About 30 minutes later, I get a text message from 'Wendy' saying, 'You are such a fucking asshole. I fucking hate you.
Hey at least I didn't charge them for the pizza. Coming from a person that was gettin' fed polish sausage in Justin's hot tub last Saturday night, (read Hot Tub Hatin') I don't think you have the right to say you are a vegetarian.
1 comment:
Andy you are such an ass hole. First of all I am not a vegan...you should fucking know that if i just ordered a fucking pizza from you with CHEESE, not to mention i fucking eat meat all the dfamn time. Second...if you're going to be calling me fat, you might want to rethink who else reads this...jenna and i, you know you're girlfriend who you dont even deserve, is the SAME FUCKING SIZE AS ME. So i guess you tihnk she's fat too? interesting...
You're such a fucking idiot andy, i am the only friend of jenna's that actually liked you and wanted to see you guys together, but after this...you've lost any respect i had for you. I hope she breaks up with you and finds someone better, cause everyone knows she deserves better.
Way to just ruin the respect and friendship of your girlfriends best friend...any guy would know that's not the way to go. GIrls listen to their friends A LOT.
Have a happy fucking birthday.
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