A few months some dip-shit from Indiana posted something talking shit about WMU's football team losing to IU. Out of the blue I get this message from this card carrying douchebag:
Hey Andrew- Congrats on a fantastic season- See you at a bowl game..........Oh wait your team was the bitch of your league while mine is heading to a post season so go fuck youself my friend because while you are #1 wrong about guessing how Indiana will end up in their division-and #2 you supported the wrong team once again. Soooooo. Have a happy Thanksgiving knowing that you should be thankful that I never will meet you at a bar because I never socialize the ugly rundown townie bars that you might visit because I'm of a higher class than you will ever be of. Never ever ever ever send me another message telling me to check how stupid you are because you are so stupid, ugly, and will amount to the person who collect my garbage you stupid piece of shit.... I'm glad my garbage will be handled by a loser like yourself.Have a great time knowing you were the bitch of your league,Mike MacDonald (my team still has something to play for)
MY RESPONSE:
Actually, my team is MSU.
Nevertheless, when I'm out of law school ill be glad to represent you when you get dragged into court for beating you wife.
Just because your dad did it does not make it ok.
cheers
---
Some people take stuff too seriously.... above I just wanted to type this statment again, becuase it is soooo classy:
Never ever ever ever send me another message telling me to check how stupid you are because you are so stupid, ugly, and will amount to the person who collect my garbage you stupid piece of shit.... I'm glad my garbage will be handled by a loser like yourself.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Law School Hatn'
As a good warm up to the pissing in the dishwasher story, here is a quickie.
Sitting in class, there is a certain fear about getting called on. Law school is very intimidating at times, and when your asked a question, and you have no idea what the answer is, a slight panic sets in.
This very thing happened with a person I sit next to, and for reasons not worth blessing with you with, we don't see eye to eye. Regardless, she was called on in class, and doing pretty good, I will give her that.
But then she was asked something she did not know, so I decided to help her out. I murmured the answer under my breath just loud enough for her to hear it, in which she relayed it back to the teacher, who frowned, and said no.
Naturally, I raised my hand and gave the teacher the right answer.
Lesson learned, don't believe everything you hear....
Sitting in class, there is a certain fear about getting called on. Law school is very intimidating at times, and when your asked a question, and you have no idea what the answer is, a slight panic sets in.
This very thing happened with a person I sit next to, and for reasons not worth blessing with you with, we don't see eye to eye. Regardless, she was called on in class, and doing pretty good, I will give her that.
But then she was asked something she did not know, so I decided to help her out. I murmured the answer under my breath just loud enough for her to hear it, in which she relayed it back to the teacher, who frowned, and said no.
Naturally, I raised my hand and gave the teacher the right answer.
Lesson learned, don't believe everything you hear....
Your Dishes Are Done...
Back when I lived in Kalamazoo, I did a lot of stupid stuff... well, I guess it just depends on what type of person you are. Take the following story for example...
It was a long night of boozing, and for some reason I ended up back at this girls apartment. The reason I say "for some reason" is that im 99% sure that I didn't hang out with this girl at all, the entire night.
The events leading up to it, such as where I was prior, how I got there, or even how I got home, are still a little hazy... But what I do vaguely recall, is workin' my way into her gully hole. I wouldn't call this girl a slut, but let's just say that it didnt take much time for me to get in pole position, but that is not the point of the story.
After my 3 hour clinic of having biblical relations (or a drunken, sloppy, five minutes of playing jump rope with her vagine), I paid her and left.
No seriously, after it was done, I really had to take a piss. I really, really, really, had to take a piss. Now if your a woman reading this right now, well number one, you cant respect the inability a man has when trytin' got take piss when his cock is in the towel rack position. Regardless, its hard to do, you get the picture. But of course, the girl went to the bathroom, because that's what they do after sex. So here I am, with my hand on my cock, trying to hold in one of the most epic pisses in my life.
Then it dawns on me... I can just go in the sink. Brilliant. So all I had to do is go to the kitchen and do my thing. Unfortunately, the logistics were flawed from the beginning. The counter is about level with my rod, so I had to go tippy-toe in order to get into firing position.
Talk about a feat of strengths... pissing with an erection alone is almost difficult- pissing with an erection on your tippy-toes is harder than Iron Man's erection.
So naturally the proverbial light goes off above my head, and I look down at the dishwasher. This was almost more convenient than a urinal. I opened the door, and let loose. By the time I heard her flush I was just about done... I closed the door and I was on my way. Maybe I should have set the dial to regular wash, since I already did the pre-wash cycle.....
It was a long night of boozing, and for some reason I ended up back at this girls apartment. The reason I say "for some reason" is that im 99% sure that I didn't hang out with this girl at all, the entire night.
The events leading up to it, such as where I was prior, how I got there, or even how I got home, are still a little hazy... But what I do vaguely recall, is workin' my way into her gully hole. I wouldn't call this girl a slut, but let's just say that it didnt take much time for me to get in pole position, but that is not the point of the story.
After my 3 hour clinic of having biblical relations (or a drunken, sloppy, five minutes of playing jump rope with her vagine), I paid her and left.
No seriously, after it was done, I really had to take a piss. I really, really, really, had to take a piss. Now if your a woman reading this right now, well number one, you cant respect the inability a man has when trytin' got take piss when his cock is in the towel rack position. Regardless, its hard to do, you get the picture. But of course, the girl went to the bathroom, because that's what they do after sex. So here I am, with my hand on my cock, trying to hold in one of the most epic pisses in my life.
Then it dawns on me... I can just go in the sink. Brilliant. So all I had to do is go to the kitchen and do my thing. Unfortunately, the logistics were flawed from the beginning. The counter is about level with my rod, so I had to go tippy-toe in order to get into firing position.
Talk about a feat of strengths... pissing with an erection alone is almost difficult- pissing with an erection on your tippy-toes is harder than Iron Man's erection.
So naturally the proverbial light goes off above my head, and I look down at the dishwasher. This was almost more convenient than a urinal. I opened the door, and let loose. By the time I heard her flush I was just about done... I closed the door and I was on my way. Maybe I should have set the dial to regular wash, since I already did the pre-wash cycle.....
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Stalker Hatin'
Today the student directory at our school came out. It has all of our information, such as a mugshot, email address, postal address, phone number, etc...
Naturally a bunch of self centered bitches are pissed off as hell because all of their personal information is in it, and they think people are going to stalk them. Before I even go on, I have to quote my immediate reaction to this assumption...
"Bitch- you should be happy anyone even talks to you."
Lets run down your stalkable characteristics: 1) your a self absorbed bitch 2) your fat 3) your ugly 4) your annoying. --Yea that sounds like you have a lot to worry about. Perhaps I should mention that the info that is in the student directory was based on a form that we had to fill out and hand into the administrative office, and it explicitly said that your information on the form would go into the student directory.
Maybe I should add a 5th quality- stupid / ignorant (take your pick).
Here is some sound advice for you... unless you realize the world does not revolve around you, get on a treadmill, put on some makeup, shut your fucking mouth and read a book, you have nothing to worry about. Nobody wants to stalk you. If anything, we will reference your picture in the directory to prevent us from firing off a load in some random.
Naturally a bunch of self centered bitches are pissed off as hell because all of their personal information is in it, and they think people are going to stalk them. Before I even go on, I have to quote my immediate reaction to this assumption...
"Bitch- you should be happy anyone even talks to you."
Lets run down your stalkable characteristics: 1) your a self absorbed bitch 2) your fat 3) your ugly 4) your annoying. --Yea that sounds like you have a lot to worry about. Perhaps I should mention that the info that is in the student directory was based on a form that we had to fill out and hand into the administrative office, and it explicitly said that your information on the form would go into the student directory.
Maybe I should add a 5th quality- stupid / ignorant (take your pick).
Here is some sound advice for you... unless you realize the world does not revolve around you, get on a treadmill, put on some makeup, shut your fucking mouth and read a book, you have nothing to worry about. Nobody wants to stalk you. If anything, we will reference your picture in the directory to prevent us from firing off a load in some random.
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Pyschotic Hate (on me for a change)
This one came out of the blue.
About 1AM last night, my friend... we'll just say her name is Emily for argument's sake calls up. Only it wasn't 'Emily', rather it was her brother.
I could tell he was at a bar, because it was noisy in the background. I was taken back at first, but then I realized who it was. Now I have met this person a few times, and he is actually a straight shooter.
I suppose before I get into the psychotic outrage I need to preface the story. In a drunken stupor, I texted her something along the lines of, "Seriously, I'll fly you out here if you fuck me."
Despite the word seriously, I was only joking, as this was a good friend from college. Keep in mind this text was a few weeks ago.
He confronts me about it and I told him it was just a joke, only to be interrupted by talks about hunting me down and giving me a good beat down. Given the situation, I gave him the benefit of the doubt... that was his little sister, and if I read it I would be pissed too. So I gave up a little slack, only to take it away when he disregarded my apology and explanation of the obvious joke (plus that was the relationship we had, we mess around like that) I even told him I have a girlfriend, and I don't need to fly anyone out here to fuck me. Still no avail. More threats ensued. Eventually his rant got old and I hung up.
See, what upsets me is how people can act like Billy Bad-Ass and make empty threats because they got a few drinks in them, and they are 900 miles away. This isn't a game. Its not 1970 where you can get in a fight and go your separate ways. Fuck the kid's dad is an attorney, you would think he would pick up some shred of intelligence.
So 20 minutes later, I get a text, saying, "This is Mike. If u ever degrading to my sister again you're a dead man."
Yea that totally seems like an appropriate response to what happened. So if for some reason, I die, that is where you should look first. That and Joseph Hazlewood. I took some gin away from him.
Curious to note, however, that he read the text from her phone, witch leads me to believe she showed him. If that's the case, then I'm washing my hands clean from that shit. I need that like Timothy McVeigh's executor needed a power outage.
So I guess I got hated on pretty good. It was an interstate hate too. So congrats.
About 1AM last night, my friend... we'll just say her name is Emily for argument's sake calls up. Only it wasn't 'Emily', rather it was her brother.
I could tell he was at a bar, because it was noisy in the background. I was taken back at first, but then I realized who it was. Now I have met this person a few times, and he is actually a straight shooter.
I suppose before I get into the psychotic outrage I need to preface the story. In a drunken stupor, I texted her something along the lines of, "Seriously, I'll fly you out here if you fuck me."
Despite the word seriously, I was only joking, as this was a good friend from college. Keep in mind this text was a few weeks ago.
He confronts me about it and I told him it was just a joke, only to be interrupted by talks about hunting me down and giving me a good beat down. Given the situation, I gave him the benefit of the doubt... that was his little sister, and if I read it I would be pissed too. So I gave up a little slack, only to take it away when he disregarded my apology and explanation of the obvious joke (plus that was the relationship we had, we mess around like that) I even told him I have a girlfriend, and I don't need to fly anyone out here to fuck me. Still no avail. More threats ensued. Eventually his rant got old and I hung up.
See, what upsets me is how people can act like Billy Bad-Ass and make empty threats because they got a few drinks in them, and they are 900 miles away. This isn't a game. Its not 1970 where you can get in a fight and go your separate ways. Fuck the kid's dad is an attorney, you would think he would pick up some shred of intelligence.
So 20 minutes later, I get a text, saying, "This is Mike. If u ever degrading to my sister again you're a dead man."
Yea that totally seems like an appropriate response to what happened. So if for some reason, I die, that is where you should look first. That and Joseph Hazlewood. I took some gin away from him.
Curious to note, however, that he read the text from her phone, witch leads me to believe she showed him. If that's the case, then I'm washing my hands clean from that shit. I need that like Timothy McVeigh's executor needed a power outage.
So I guess I got hated on pretty good. It was an interstate hate too. So congrats.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
No Posts Do Not Mean No Hates....
Well its been a solid 2 months with no updates, and for that I apologize.
It seems as if I have entered a noble profession, so I am held to a higher standard of behavior. This may be, but there is still a lot of hate to go around... This is a good hate put on a kid who goes to University of Indiana (who is in the Big Ten), and decided to talk shit about beating WMU (who is in the MAC).
So naturally I had to do some polluting on facebook (because I'm 10): "Ok, Ok.....Lets talk shit about a Big 10 team beating a MAC team... That's about as good as a matchup as watching your dad beat your mom after he has been hanging out with Jack Daniels. Hey have fun being the bitch of the Big 10. Once Indiana goes to a bowl, instead of smoking one, you can talk shit. Mike, shouldn't you be harvesting corn right now?"
It seems as if I have entered a noble profession, so I am held to a higher standard of behavior. This may be, but there is still a lot of hate to go around... This is a good hate put on a kid who goes to University of Indiana (who is in the Big Ten), and decided to talk shit about beating WMU (who is in the MAC).
So naturally I had to do some polluting on facebook (because I'm 10): "Ok, Ok.....Lets talk shit about a Big 10 team beating a MAC team... That's about as good as a matchup as watching your dad beat your mom after he has been hanging out with Jack Daniels. Hey have fun being the bitch of the Big 10. Once Indiana goes to a bowl, instead of smoking one, you can talk shit. Mike, shouldn't you be harvesting corn right now?"
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